Week 5: The "Mini-Chads" Emerge

We start week 5 with the guys celebrating the departure of Chad by throwing his protein powder into the air.   
Only one problem... Chad isn't quite gone... yet.
                                            
Alex comes back from the 2 on 1 "the hero" aka "slayer of the dragon".  Not bad for a vertically challenged guy.

So... Chad exits the building... and the show... 
                                     

But who will slay all the "Mini-Chads" that have emerged?  It's a frightening thought.  Mini-Alex can't possibly take them all on.  
                                                      

At the rose ceremony, some guys go home, shockingly, Evan wasn't one of them.  I seriously do not know what she sees in him.  I really do not.  It baffles me.  It pains me really.  

Anyway, onto Uruguay for some more drama filled fun times.

The first solo date goes to Jordan and suddenly he's public enemy number one.  He does strike me as evil personified.  
                                              
The guys at the house take time to read the tabloids and worry about an article they come across about our Bachelorette and her Ex.  Bad guy Chad.  Her ex.  Not to be confused with The Chad Bear who has exited the show... we think.
                                             
Let's be real, the producers had to do something to make up for the Chad-factor... because we all miss the Chad Bear.  Producers gave the guys this article to stir up crap for JoJo - we can all see through it people!  Come on!

Too bad Producer-people, the guys didn't feed into it like you had hoped.  No one bailed.  No one caused a fight.  No one yelled.  

Moving on.
                                           

The group date takes everyone sand surfing.  This is literally one of my worst nightmares ("one of" because I have many a phobia).  But seriously, they had to have had sand in so many places.  Super uncomfortable places.
                                         

Tonight we learn Alex hates lots of people.  First it was Chad.  Now it's Derek.  Alex hates Derek.  Alex might just have "Little Big Man Syndrome" - it's a real thing.

Derek gets a rose on the group date to 'reassure him' and this sets Alex's hate radar off!
                                           
The next solo date goes to Robby - who?  I barely know who he is, this is his FIRST date with JoJo and he's IN LOVE WITH HER!  I'm sorry, WHAT?
Red alert, red alert!!!
                                            
He tells her he loves her, she thanks him... and "appreciates it"... drop him, drop him like a sack of heavy potatoes!  Please, for the love of all that is right, drop him NOW!


JoJo is becoming the queen of cancelling the cocktail party.  
Alex is sounding like a broken record with the whole "if ___ stays and I go home this is a joke."  He used to fill in that blank with Chad's name and now it's Derek.  Look out Derek, Mini-Alex has a history of making people go home.  Well, Chad... so far, just Chad.

3 of the guys go home - and OH HAPPY DAY we can celebrate the departure of Evan!!  Oh how that made my day!  It's been a long time coming. I may never understand how he got through all these weeks... but all is well and right in the world again.  Yessss baby!!
                                         
















Until next week, I'm going to take this moment to say my goodbyes... much like Evan did, minus the tears.

~xo KP